Some hotels should come with a behaviour warning. Cowley Manor nestled in the glorious Cotswold countryside (90mins from London) featuring lakes, ponds, giant oak trees and a grand Victorian cascading waterfall, is the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe meets Pride and Prejudice – or if you’re me, a boarding school fantasy come true.
The 55 acres of Grade II-listed parkland are overrun with wild flowers and thorny hideouts, ripe for secret rendezvous, and for anyone who checked in during the weekend of my visit, I can only apologise for my antics. Yes, the curvy naked lady on a first floor stone terrace was me… This is the kind of decorum Cowley Manor inspires.
Perhaps it’s the naughty Duke who haunts the corridors, or maybe it’s the tongue-in-cheek works-of-art hanging from dark panelled staircases. Whatever it is, there’s plenty at Cowley to encourage detention.
Thirty rooms (15 in the main house and 15 in the stable block), all feature generous bathrooms with rain showers and tubs big enough for two, bedecked with locally-produced Green & Spring organic products, plus free WIFI, flat screen TVs and Bose docking stations.
Our suite was large and airy with views over the lawn and lakes, so you can watch the ducks and geese play chase between the ancient trees. Completely void of any stately house gloom, and contemporary to the max, rooms boast Japanese-style low-slung four posters with vintage leather headboards, multi-coloured retro carpets (think DVF /Missoni), raspberry pink Arne Jacobsen Egg chairs and Swedish-style storage units to keep things tidy. The best room is number 17.
Throughout the hotel, the emphasis is on modern British design with bespoke furniture and original artworks, although it has to be said, some of the public areas feel a little shabby around the edges and could benefit from an update.
Book a table in the dining room for supper. It’s an impressive space with dramatic red ceilings, 12-foot French windows, parquet floors and comfy sage-green leather chairs. Our amuse-bouches were delivered in mini glass teacups, and there was nothing faddy about the pea and mint mêlée dedans.
Breakfast was served the best way: hot and fast. Fresh mango and sweet melon slices, black pudding (not too greasy) and firm local sausages. My only criticism was the tea which was served in a complex maraca-style Tovolo tea infuser. Too much fuss for my shaky morning hand.
The C.Side Spa is where Cowley truly excels. It’s more than just a chic space, it’s an architectural achievement. Boasting a slate-lined indoor pool and a glistening saltwater outdoor pool, open all year round, there are four treatment rooms, a gym, mani/pedi area, steam room and sauna. Go for a massage and you’ll be offered a choice of playlists – no danger of dolphin sonars or jingly-jangly yoga music here.
Whether you prefer to spend time in the spa, the shop (which has Vogue’s stamp of approval), the snooker room or your suite, I can think of no better place to unleash one’s inner schoolgirl. Just don’t tell your parents.
